2/20/17 Shrink visit and log

At my med check today, I asked my psychiatrist how to prevent the flashbacks and breakdowns I’ve had both times I got down to about 250 pounds. He said that reaction might not repeat and he would help me if it did. But I know the weight regain is related to my ptsd, and I’ve lost hundreds of pounds twice, and both times the flashbacks started, and then I broke. The last breakdown left me almost catatonic and I can’t go back there. It’s easier to be morbidly obese, but not this big.

So I’m sticking to my plan of losing just until I reach about 280 and then maintaining. My body likes that weight anyway because I weighed that at puberty, and I always plateaued there for months, having to slash calories and ramp up exercise to lose again. I should be able to maintain 280 comfortably.

Meals- breakfast was an oreja pastry from a latino bakery with one cup of warmed milk and coffee. I also ate an orange about 3 hours later.

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At lunchtime I was ravenous and just getting home with nothing ready, but I did not want to waste calories on fast food. So I just grabbed some stuff from the fridge and made a meal out of one cup of cottage cheese, one cup of frozen mangoes, a banana, and one tablespoon of Smuckers natural peanut butter.

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For dinner I made Thai shrimp salad. My recipe, which uses ingredients I usually have instead of several exotic ingredients I’d only use in this dish, is under main dish recipes.

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Exercise- My quads are a little sore. Not painful, but I feel it with every step. I missed that feeling when I’d stopped exercising, but I wanted to give my quads a rest so I just did a little stretching today.

Focus and motivation building– I read articles on sparkpeople and commented on the chats there.

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